I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.
Add "its too hot" to reasons why I don't get fucked anymore
And he showed us your test. You wrote what is this shit and scribbled on it? Nice 3%..
The worst part is I think my tongue cut his penis and now he wont talk to me.
Just came out of my room at 8 AM to find 2 pounds of raw hamburger and a half eaten cake strewn across the hallway. And I'm not surprised at all.
Idk. I was speaking metaphorically. Go for it. As one of your bad decisions, I feel confident in saying you've done worse.
how many ponies have to be on my pajama pants to convince him im gay?
i think we need a new approach.
Also I stopped in the middle of the road and put my hazards on because BUNNIES WERE PLAYING
you didnt realize it, but you puked in the bushes in front of a church and yelled "GOD IS DEAD"
I just paid $10 for tinder plus so that I could change my location to Rio and match with Olympic Athletes
Who the fuck is "nick from the beach last year"
No idea hahaha...why?
He just texted me.. Should I ask where I met him?
Sorry again for almost setting you on fire.
It's not a hangover, it's "slept on a couch with another person and said person moves a lot and is loud"
U were so upset when the shower ruined ur nachos. I didn't kno what to do.
I can't be a daydrinker without you. It just doesn't work.
I love you too.
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