I want to snug with you.
You want my snuggie?
Martha Stewart would most definitely roll a great joint.
We had one of those mutual "I know your on a dating website, I won't tell if you won't" glances.
Relationship's official after skype sex--college kid at his finest.
This exeeds the amount of high I planned on being.
Aaaaand that would be the most of my hand I've ever fit into a vagina before.
The leasing office is hiring, so I gave them my resume and class schedule. I doubt they'll call me considering last summer at their "exotic animal" pool party I marched in with a funnel and demanded the employees chug. I doubt they've forgotten.
You need to fuck him. The man has his own Wikipedia.
I'm laying in bed listening to Purple Rain on repeat. If you wanna bone, come up, but if not, at least Prince understands me.
well what the fuck is the POINT of teetotal mardi gras
At this point, I'd date an ax murderer. So long as he doesn't cry all the time, have ED, or leave me with his unspayed cat. My list of requirements is becoming increasingly specific.
Woke up this morning with fake blood all over my bed which is a positive considering last year it was all real blood
I'm gonna celebrate Valentines day by watching Bob Ross videos and tripping balls.
still drunk on my way to class to give my presentation on the negative affects of alcohol on the body. hell yes.
I love you.
Bad choice
Randomize
