JoAnns office is warmer than mine. . .it must be because she has the gateway to hell under her desk.
Just wondering why in an apartment full of stoners there is half a waffle in the TRASH CAN. get ur shit together man
fuck you guys, stop putting fake babies in my car the cops came again.
I found her sitting in the shower having an argument with the dolphins on the shower curtain.
We can't bring brittanys dog so we are getting high and getting in my bathtub I think it's pretty safe
Not sure if this is better or worse than the discovery that bourbon and hot chocolate is a viable combo
I peed on his girlfriend's loofah during our post-sex shower.
Someone shat in our tub last night. I'm not pointing fingers but you priors make you a prime suspect.
I just got three pairs of underwear free and a bathing suit for $20 by modeling them and letting the salesman grope me a bit.
It's great being a young gay man in Chicago!
If you're funny as hell and have a mustache, odds are I'm probably gonna fuck you
You could see the bone sticking out of his shin and he insisted he was "just gunna walk it off"
On a scale of 1 to 10 how concerned should I be
We were making eye contact while i was throwing up.
I cannot believe all 4 of us had sex at the same time, in the same bed... And it didn't turn into a foursome..
I'm sittin in my Hawaiian shorts watching the office eating cold asparagus. wow do I suck when you're not here.
Randomize
