Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
You should really figure out how to get me a picture that will pop up on my phone when you call
Just upload a picture of Bea Arthur. That's what my soul looks like these days
he said he has something really important to tell me but isn't ready yet. It's either that he loves me or has herpes
who said I'd never amount to anything...i just won 'most enthusiastic' at my poledancing class
I want to bury your face in my vagina. Possibly by force. I will try not to suffocate you though.
Dreamed I made out with a stranger after falling out of a car, let's make this happen tonight.
Now that I'm single, I like to think of myself as in a relationship with Taco Bell.
Oh I will totally be your beard, but on one condition I get to watch you and your boy friend have sex.
Part of my treatment is getting high and having sex with 22 year olds. I have a prescription!
My memory of last night is a delicious blur of tits, ass, and alcohol.
FUCK YOU IM DRINKING WINE FROM A BOX
You okay there or need a ride? Maybe a straw for your box
Maybe a straw...
Did I tell you about my dream that I got handed a $100 and my vagina dissolved it? I think it wants me to not be a whore anymore.
You are ridiculously similar to a unicorn, and I want to fuck that unicorn.
I know you told me I shouldn't go see him...that's why I'm texting you letting you know I made it home safe from his house this morning
I was about to break it off with him because I realised he only wanted me for sex, until I realised that I only wanted HIM for sex. Win/win
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