My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
Just threw up in a trash can by the ATM. Then pulled out money for weed.
I'd give my left nut to see you
don't do that. I like the set
I'm just not sure how to initiate the "do you want to have sex with my boyfriend and I" conversation
aaaannd alcoholism beats pride. it's like grown-up rock, paper, scissors
Nicole, you can't keep coming over at 3am wanting to build igloos.
who were those guys at the table sniffing dryer sheets?
It was honestly like he was directing a porno or something. he kept telling different people to grab other people's boobs, it was all very artistic.
There's a questionable stain on Harley's bed...would they have sex on a dog bed?
I just gave a bum a ride back to his bench. Columbus is weird but I like it.
Jimmy johns delivers to the bar behind work. Happy vodka day!
Lol if he questions who I am I'm gonna send him a pic of his boxers
I started carrying sissors in my purse to open plan B with. Both ashamed and proud.
What can I say, like your penis. The fact that I like the person attached to it helps too
I think it’s appropriate to celebrate the start of mother’s day at the bar with the men that almost made me a mother
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