There's a woman here that looks like a cross between Michael Jackson and Flipper.
Now you know why i just sit on the toilet and scream
I honestly didn't see the problem playing beer pong In the car on the road trip home.
Dude. I kneed him in the face and gave him a black eye. It's like a constant reminder of our hookup. I feel like herpes. I never go away...
I'm not sure that our 12-years-ago-high-school-"relationship," and 179 texts in the last 4 hours is gonna be enough to squeeze a naked smartphone picture of me. I'm gonna need some chicken wings or Makers Mark before that starts happening.
Me. blonde. Sex. Dance floor.
He said it. He actually said "yes it's in".
It's all fun and games until some random starts jerking it on the deck.
As I was puking, these 2 guys started peeing next to me chanting me on
He has an accent, blue cross AND gainful employment. Just saying, he's going to urgent care once I'm done with him
I didn't tell that thing I wasn't coming over. Whoops
You know you haven't dated in a while when you call boys "that thing" and call dates "a boy type thing."
She didn't get a tit job, she's just wearing the right size bra for once
Can't we just go back to fucking and having your boyfriend think you're completely straight?
Hahah I’ve never had someone stop me mid-coitus to tell me how amazing I am. Def ego boost.
I can't say too many people would say watching their drunk best friends fuck in a hot tub is very normal.
Randomize
