Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
This is why you don't make out with cougars at a bar... I got a linkedin request from her, wtf?
we just drove by a car that was painted for a grad, it said "you done it!" with a confederate flag bumper sticker next to it. i love kentucky
I asked you if you were ok and you said "dude I'm fine, I'm in the recovery position"
I'm getting to the point of going up to a guy and saying "Hi I'm maggie and i can put my foot behind my head"... That desperate.
I just took my birth control with a water bottle I found in my purse with vodka in it in Spanish class. 10am is still too early for me.
You were, but he disappeared after you said you wanted him to get you pregnant so you'd have a child by the time the Boy Meets World sequel starts
I'm still high with raccoon eyeliner eyes and chocolate all over my face and chest, clutching a mug of wine. Happy graduation.
my talents include tricking people into giving me money and free drugs
We were on a plane, I couldn't just grab his dick
you can't get cum all over my hair and then tell me you just want to be friends
Our house rule in beer pong, is that if you get the ball in the bitch cup.... you have to snapchat your balls to everyone on your friends list.
Why is there a waffle in the knife drawer?
The real question is why are there knives in the waffle drawer.
"fuck it, let's do moonshine" shouldn't be in ANYONE'S vocabulary.
That was the most spiritually awakened shit I have ever taken.
Randomize
