They should really pass out barf bags in church
its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
how do i say, "my ex is going to be at this party so don't look like shit" without sounding like a bitch?
bad decision saturdays are such a good decision
I walked into the garage and you were telling the bikes that you were not that drunk.
Theres a freshman smoking a pipe on campus. This new class is setting a new standard we're not ready for
I found someone's tooth on the stairs when I was vacuuming, and my sister found a catheter in the men's bathroom... this cleaning job is dangerous
He just kept yelling cup my balls to everyone they kicked us out after 20 min
Just out of curiosity. Did you wait until my fb picture was well liked by others before liking it so people won't know we're fucking?
I have a vague memory of you tryin to ride a unicycle through jimmy johns
how many ponies have to be on my pajama pants to convince him im gay?
i think we need a new approach.
Well I'm going to hell. But I'm going after multiple orgasms.
Btw I did not technically have a dick in me but I was naked in bed with a man during the last finals game so that is why the Warriors won
I woke up in bed spooning a vacuum cleaner
You're now part of the minority of friends who haven't seen my boobs.
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