Hey its my first time.
I think you mean "it's my first time"
His mom just asked me if I was "fooling around with her baby again" and then when I walked downstairs his dad YELLED "Look who's taking the walk of shame!"
You really need to stop fucking dudes who still live with their parents.
im a genious. moved my bed and mirror so i can watch the game while Fucking
And then you told your sister how horrible of a friend I was because I couldn't get you cheese fries...
why is there a sandwich nailed to the wall
i need a wealthy benefactor or a cocktail job. or to start stripping. or kill myself. whatever.
My parents just told me I first got drunk when I was 4. Successsssssss
How many times can you lose to your mom in beer pong before you can no longer show your face around campus?
I know its been a few months but you must know you hve the 2nd biggest dick I've ever seen. 1st place went to a rapper so don't feel bad.
I just beer bonged. Soco and spite please get on my levvl my hair is in buns
some guy just burried his vomit in the sand.
I think my staff loses a little bit of respect for me every time you're in town. I may have to puke at work ...again.
Sorry. Not doing life today. Love to. But can't.
Look I'm sorry I stuffed your wife's bouquet toss but I won't have that weak shit in my house.
What? No, wine isn't my weakness, I just love it.
Randomize
