I felt weird they were both staring at me waiting for the scoop on how your vagina felt.
It's sore actually
I think it's our patriotic duty to get high and watch the state of the union tonight
Subtly mention that I'm not a lesbian. I would only go for rebecca's nipples because they're pierced and I like shiny things.
I tried exercising today. I ended up masturbating to the Wii fit trainer.
I am going to be fat forever.
Remember when we used to share painkillers at parties? Now we're dealing in blood pressure pills. Oh, how the mighty have fallen.
She kept saying how cute and adorable I was. I felt like a care bear getting a blowjob
My love will cover her like lulu lemon yoga pants. Casually supportive and always complimenting your Ass.
we somehow managed to fit a llama, a stripper pole and a hayride all into the same day.
hes like bread. how could bread be dangeous
Can rosie odonnell just not be a lesbian? Shes stressing me out, knowing we bat for the same team.
we just talked about our morning and what we were doing for the day and he handed me the addies and i took $50 out of my bra in front of a bunch of frat guys. so the mornings going really well
McDonald's and a car nap. I feel kinda human
So the 25yr old smokeshow I fucked last night said "Prepare to be disappointed" as he put the condom on. I was. 40 is bullshit.
We just finished having sex and as soon as we get out of bed he yells "trust fall" and runs me over
Just told my mom life fisted my asshole. She looked at me with complete understanding. I'm scared...
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