Getting fucked up met up rando with a girl I confesswed my love for last night. weird, going with it
I realized courtney is my jiminy cricket but instead of preventing me from telling lies she prevents me from fucking strangers
I was about to watch some really classy porn. Title was ravenous for dick. I didnt know pornstars knew ravenous was a word.
you kept shouting how the only tree you would hump is an elm tree because they're under populated
I don't know why girls would even talk to someone as drunk as I was.
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
There is a mobile STD testing unit set up at my place of employment. In the lunchroom. I may need to reevaluate my career choices. And my lunch plans.
These welts and bruises from letting gay boys whip my thighs last night are a clear indication i should lay off the tequila.
how many times have i told you.. they dont like when you laugh during sex
That's the last time I get in a car with six rappers headed to god knows where.
I also just stashed a half dozen bobby pins in my bra.... So when you take it off later, consider yourself warned
My phone just put together a highlight reel of yesterday's dick pic session, set to music and everything
Because you touch yourself at night.
...What time of day am I supposed to do it?
It’s like my vagina just knows when a man is a barrel-chested freedom fighter.
Randomize
