For the whole 7 seconds I lasted, I was in heaven.
Biggest lesson I have learned in college: Drink if you are happy. Drink more if you aren't.
A very small part of me wants you to appreciate me for more than just my breasts. But the rest of me is breasts.
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
I like to take my ritalin one pill at a time with each pill spaced out a couple minutes so I feel like I'm going super saiyan when they kick in.
I woke up to him yelling "WHO SLEEPS WITH A BEER IN THEIR HAND?!?" this of course, startled me awake and made me spill the aforementioned beer. So I guess the a answer is- not this girl, not anymore. Asshole
Please brint me miilk. I am on the floor but my door is open. Thank you, i appreciate u verry much.
My tweets this weekend consisted of me telling every bar I went to that they were my favorite valentine. I've never felt like more of an alcoholic
Some lady just walked up to me in the bar and proclaimed that I looked like a "shady motherfucker." Can't argue with that one.
By the way, do you realize that you asked me how much you could get for your eggs last night. And once you learned the price said that you had plenty to share.
Watching this game makes me realize that we have yet to do Skype shots. What kind of long distance alcoholics are we?
Sunday mornings are confusing. Like. I can't decide if I want to go for a run or start drinking
I'm using her Instagram as a way to know where in town she is so I can avoid her lol
Do you know who these girls are? They're baking a cake, making chicken enchiladas, and bringing me beer everytime I finish one.
True college students do jello shots in the library
Randomize
