it was like playing where's waldo with your underwear
i just saw an asian skipping down the street and it made me think of you
Just joined the godiva rewards club. Who's the fat friend now.
my dentist asked me why my tooth was chipped, i told him i couldn't remember. i think he understands.
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
I just stood next to my childhood self. Fuck, I'm really stoned...
Didn't know what to wear so I ripped off my bed sheets and tied myself a toga. "a little hungover" is no way to describe me right now.
I don't like him near enough to give up day drinking AND my prostitute costume
After seeing all of the pics during the trial, all I could think was "her vagina doesn't look THAT dangerous"
And the view of you in reverse cowgirl is arguably the most spectacular view ever... And I've seen the Eiffle tower, the colosseum, mountains of Hawaii, Michaelangelo's David, and the Mona Goddamn Lisa. Just saying.
I mean, I already put pants on today. We're already halfway there
That was the second worst thing to happen to my asshole.
Erin was right. There were bees at the after hours.
Orgasms and cereal.... that's what life's about.
I snuck a teenager into a club last nite, I felt like such a criminal. It was Awsome
Randomize