i puked out the bus window last night on the way home. i remember it, but i don't remember everyone else screaming to put their windows up.
never have i ever had a craving for dick this badly
I don't remember her name, but I do remember yelling at her from the balcony of the hotel room during her walk of shame.
We need to either drink and not go to waffle house or go to waffle house and not drink. I need to know which is causing these shits.
Please tell me I did not ask the bartender how big his dick was.
Just walked in on my older brother getting a bj. He told the girl to "keep going" and then attempted to high five me
Dude. I have so much pot that i only worry about running out of lighters
Welp I just blew a load probably the size of a small pond if not a lake
Who the fuck is this
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
I made out with my former step mother's best friend. Only knew the connection when they both showed up together at the bar.
I need to stop getting high and watching documentaries. Wanna go to Japan with me and protest the mass genocide of dolphins?
I just used my citation as a bookmark. Want a beer?
I don't get promposals. When I asked my date I was so drunk I couldn't lift my head. Then I puked on my lawn after he said "ok whatever". That's romance
We need a signal or code word for "I basically shaved my whole body and we should touch each other tonight".
just found a joint on the street in downtown. smoked it with the hot guy from my chem class
WHAT IS UP WITH YOU SMOKING/ DRINKING THINGS OFF THE GROUND?
Randomize
