She looks like Robin Williams dressed as a frog.
plans for tonight: dress up like pirates, drink a bottle of mad dog and watch the sorostitues across the street get naked. and yes, the mad dog part is already in play. hurry the fuck up. i look like a loser doing this alone.
Is there a "Plan B" app for my iphone?
the line runs infront of fredricks of hollywood. it's like gamestop is showing me how pathetic I am.
It's like God knew that was my ex's best friend and punished me. I've never vomited that much in my life.
Not even desperate vagina wants small cock.
Glad to hear you raised your standards
I'm sorry but that single bed couldn't hold all five of us, especially with those boobs.
The only alcohol in the house was a bottle of Sherry. It's like cough syrup that I shotgunned off Strawberry Shortcake's ass.
Well he just said "there's glass on the floor and it's okay I'm only bleeding out of my esophagus" so yes he's tripping
No it's only my right leg that feels like it's about to fall off. The left is fine.
I can smell the sangria seeping out of my pores
I wish everyone could suck his dick. It was an honor.
Access to a Target is paramount to my general happiness and self-worth.
you drug him to get him horny then deny him sex. freaks.
Don't come in. My door to my bathroom won't close because of the table and I'm pooping
Classy
Randomize
