she just waddled down the stairs behind me and puked and kind of reached for me but i sped up. does that make me a bad person?
is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
kevin brought a 6ft brunette runway model with him tonight. Now, im not sure what the fuck the color of the " i get it, its over, Im ugly" flag is.... but i'll wave it.
rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
I just want you to know that i just realized your the only friend i dont feel fat around.
Okay, just a casual question: how did i manage to get grass stains on the inside of my bra?
He whinnies like a horse when he's cumming. I wish I would have known this before we got into a relationship.
I've never known a guy to fuck more random girls in the ass then Dom. His rectal kill ratio is at like 85%
He's like the Derek Jeter of Anal
I don't know what kind of soup they made, but it smells like condoms.
In honor of Sarah Palin's bday I suggest we watch Nailing Palin
The funny part was that the cop pulled us over cause the park was closed, not because I had just come up from giving the guy a blowjob when the cop drove by.
just woke up and currently drinking copious amounts of eggnog straight from the carton to replenish the electrolytes lost last night
The parents I babysit for are at this orgy. I need to leave.
All I remember is that I was trying to call my wolf pack by howling.
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when I get back.
Randomize
