i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
apparently they started giving me water shots and i couldnt tell the difference
Apparently tackling a bar stool and crashing to the floor while yelling for 6 shots of whiskey won't get you thrown out on St Pattys Day.
He went into the alley to piss and came back a minute later with a case of Bud Select. I'm speechless.
I cant feel my face. Like I dont even know if I have one. I wish I had a helmet
I am ina trunk. Iam in a trunnnnnjkk. I hope its yours. Oh manomanomano. Thids better be your trunk
For gods sake, I only took one. With two nyquils. What a happy world its been today. Fulfill your obligations and then its marvelouso.
There is nothing more demoralizing than exchanging 150 dollar Christmas gifts with a girl your not sleeping with
after the fucking you spent twenty minutes vomiting naked and shaking your dick at my roommates. luckily, i don't remember that, or i'd have to be really insulted.
She made this little rubber cap thing that looks like a brain to go on my dick. She calls it a "penis cap". Industrial design students are weird...
I'm so baked, I spent the last hour trying to screencapture the cracks on my phone.
I just want you to know that i deffinately saw the baby clothes, and didn't freak out and still had sex with him. I'm going to hell.
He nailed that bed down really well so it won't break again. All I could think while he was nailing it was "challenge accepted".
Your sister just admitted to being a " much bigger bitch" than you. So you've got that going for you, which is nice.
you drug him to get him horny then deny him sex. freaks.
Randomize
