every time i get drunk at her place i end up leaving with nothing but an empty box of toaster strudels..
My RA just tried to write me up for having sex too loudly during quiet hours.
it's like iHOP with fire
how in the hell can u get pulled over when ur car is parked.
Oh my god my life; so much cake and so little sex
There's three frat guys comparing how you were in bed. apparently you have gotten worse with time
Someone just took a shot from my crotch. I should not have to drive home
We fist bumped behind their backs while drunk hooking up with them... Do other girls do this too? Or is it just us?
Didn't know hookah bars could end badly. I feel for her hair
Yea we had fun. Lost my wallet some girl has it. Sarah fell asleep in a cab and ended up at some wawa. It was cray. She's home now
Dude, if that was the MLB player I think it was leaving your bedroom this morning please tell me you got his autograph. It could pay the rent for like six months.
Bra is off & I'm snuggled in a pizza. Adulting is good.
I have wine with a bendy straw bitches I can do fucking anything
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
I never thought I'd be complaining about having sex 4 times a day, but here we are...
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