Guess who got arrested for public drunkiness, and called jimmy johns for the entire station last night instead of someone to bail me out? The cop that arrested me drove me home. Win.
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
CNN just did a special on how to do heroin safely.. I recorded it for us
So High I just made Cadbury Coffee. I don't know what it is yet, but it involves Cadbury Eggs and coffee.
There's a certain level of slut that i can handle.... I think she just broke that scale
This whole situation could've been avoided if you would've just let me open the beer
She literally just cut half her hair off because she's tired of asking someone to hold it back when shes drunk and puking.
THIS NIGHT WILL NOT GO DICKLESS
Some idiot from high school is in the hospital for bonging three beers up his ass
He should have died. Natural selection.
At some point i could of swore that you were in my bedroom riding a manatee last night..... I like my new dealer
You said my dick was impressive. You thank someone when they say that. My momma raised a gentleman.
Lets get real here, ive seen your moms breasts multiple times
I just shit a hot coal. Pretty sure it's that fireball shot from yesterday.
A guy claiming to be the Japanese counterpart to the White Power Ranger is trying to take me home....
What part of the grouping of the words "anal beads" confuses you?
Randomize
