I wish my cat could text because i would tell him that everything will be ok. and i wish he could send them back..but him have no thumbs. him no know what he would text with.
I just took a girl with a hip brace and crutches on a date. she obviously can't bone. is it rude to demand a blowjob?
he made transformer sounds every time he changed positions. how do you think it went?
this crazy girl in up in Dennys is going crazy because Bob Saget just texted her.
they shut off the water. shaving my legs with soda. that desperate.
the bartender cut u off when u asked him for his screename so u could IM him later
Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
Omg this is like trying to sleep on a pile of ballsacks.
He wanted me to choke him with my feet. So now I feel obligated to start writing my memoir
That portion can talk about stepping out of your comfort zone and how it can potentially kill people
I've entered the world of uncircumcised penises. It's disgusting.
He was leaving the restaurant I was going to as I was parking. I didn't want to scream, "hey, didn't I jerk you off?" Out of my window at 10 am
he has the ass of a greek god and he made me breakfast
Then James put his arms through the window and grabbed him, like he was Robocop. A nerdy, portly Robocop.
Who is this?
I've had pants off for 3 hours now. America.
it was weird i started the party in just my underwear and woke up in my clothes
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