just got my girl scout cookies. wanna get high?
you kept going on about how you couldnt haven been the one throwing up because you were peeing in circles.
The night took a downhill turn when he started using a butter knife as a spoon to drink his cosmo
I wanna thank you for having such slutty friends growing up. Your a great little sister
He snuck out of bed at 9 am and came back with pizza and a bottle of wine. I think I'm in love!
I love my boobs, they're the only thing that supports me. They make me a solid 6.
Tried to dry my shoes in the oven last night.
Did you just buzz the apartment and throw shit at the window? Josh and rob came into my room and woke me up
Fuck you Ian. U owe me $3.65 cuz thasts what I thfrew at ur window trying to wake ur ass up. And fuck u for not giving a shit
He is now tagging himself in my pics from last year where he is barely visable in the corner. i feel like he's marking his territory.
Nope. Daytime is texting time. Night time is you send me naked pictures time.
They fucked on my pong table last St. Patty's and broke it. I feel like I should be hiding my new one. Would hate for a tradition to form.
You went streaking and came back with your shirt inside out. Then said "it happens in the line of duty" and passed out.
I wanna send them a card but I don't think hallmark makes a "sorry your fiance and another girl blew me at the same time in a frat house but congrats!" card
He wants another date...I mean he's cute, but I just am not ready to give up my glamorous single-girl lifestyle here.
you mean the one where you drink out of the carton and don't wear pants?
Yeah, and pee with the door open. It's the little things.
Omg. I checked my purse this morning and I'm pretty sure drunk me stole a frat guys tube of crest 3d white toothpaste. Like that's pretty fucked up but I think if I knew someone did that to me I'd probably still invite them over again cuz I'd be like, "this girl's creative, and has good hygiene."
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