if i get an abortion, then will you go out with me?
i just saw her new tattoo, how much more trashy can you get than having "taste the rainbow" on your body for the rest of your life?
I used a physics textbook to prop her up so she wouldn't choke on her vomit...see I have learned something from statics class.
Leaving the dealer's house. He just gave me a sincere hug and said good luck. This cant end well.
This kid is too lonely to be my drug dealer.
Did you write "I hope this gives you aids" on my box of capn crunch?
I was passed out on the dog bed yelling "I UNDERSTAND"
Of course... Double fistin nati light cuz the powers out and it cuts down the times i gotta open the fridge... Genius
I feel awful
Physically or morally
Physically. The only immoral thing I did was steal money from strippers while they gave me lapdances.
Ughhhh. Finnnneeeeee. I'll have sex with your brother. Sheesh. The things I do for you woman.
Still no second date. Guess you shouldn't show guys your taser on the first date.
Dude a gay guy just Sparta kicked this Samoan guy for calling him a flamer you need to get down here the free kamakazee shots haven't even started yet
Like he held up the condom afterwards, twirled it with his finger, and said "look at that load"
We fired a shoe out of a medieval cannon. I know not where we got either one.
I guess we coulda said a little less mature audience and a little more e for everyone.
Randomize
