all we ever talk about is how much i like your dick or my drug problem.
Just think about it this way, every time you work Sunday, it's another $75 and that equals another hooker when we go to Amsterdam.
I used puppy pads next to the couch for her to throw up on....
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
Should I be concerned you put your last name in my phone as "danger"?
I wish everyone could suck his dick. It was an honor.
I just walked out of the side door of the bar to come in the front door so no one would know I've been here drinking before our work meeting.
You're like a human soul vacuum cleaner.
The CEO is puking on the sidewalk and the HR director just offered me coke. Engineers have the best parties
His middle name is Julius so I named his penis Caesar and told him he has to say "Hail Caesar!" whenever he comes. He didn't seem to like the idea, though.
He called me for phone sex. Do you know how hard it is to fake an orgasm, and play Candy Crush at the same time?
Idk why more people don't drink at work ... i mean, yeah, the cash might be off tonight, but my customer service is fucking phenomenal right now
if he becomes president of the united states, I will tell EVERYONE that i took his virginity.
she has no right to get mad at us for drinking during the wedding. she's the one that chose the bridesmaid dresses with pockets.
He's eating me out right now. That's how bad he is.
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