Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
Waiting outside the STD clinic 30 min before it opens already in a line up. It's like were all waiting for a concert that no ones really pumped for
he rubbed his balls on my face to wake me up.. this friends with benefits thing is getting out of hand.
I've never played a more sexually-tense game of Uno in my life.
The calves of my jeans are covered in jello shots from Sunday, how desperate do I have to be before I start licking them?
The staff doesn't like it when you try and take your wheelchair for a joy ride since I've been waiting for an hour and a half.
Im 95% ready to shit behind 711
This is my first time seeing you since your lesbian experience. SO EXCITED!
honestly i just want a cigarette and someone to go down on me... are you interested in helping with either of those
His phone pocket dialed me while he was crapping. He was quietly singing stayin alive and possibly passing his intestines.
Member that time when we got super drunk and had fun and fell in love
I remember it like it was tomorrow.
Because Kyle had a tattoo kit at his house and I wanted one and all he could draw was a mustache or a stickman on fire
This bird just went for my eyes. Does he think I'm dead???
I walk into the pharmacy and I'm like "I need three morning after pills" and the guy was like "uhhhh". All I said was "we didn't plan it, we all just got laid the same night"
the only fun thing to do here is drink beer and make mistakes. i feel like im in college again
Randomize
