Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
he said i'm too pretty to suck penis
He kept waking up periodically throughtout the night to bit my ear and pass back out.
and you will have a crown and it will be made of penises and all will bow before you and your glorious penis crown
And there might be a gallon of sangria without the lid on the floor in your room. Just be careful when you open the door.
THIS IS THE EMERGENCY BOOZE SYSTEM. I AM EN ROUTE TO DEWITT WITH A FIFTH OF TEQUILA. THIS IS NOT A TEST
Will it be a clothes optional week when I get there? I have an amazing outfit of tattoos and toenail polish planned.
FYI, grandma is already drunk and using a bed sheet as a table cloth.
Do you think wearing a shirt that says I like penis is too much for tonight?
I have alcoholic tendencies but you know what? College
I was just trying to flirt with James Franco but she kept telling me to take shots out of Ron Burgundy's mouth
I swear to god if I see a single piece of genitalia I'm driving back to LI and smacking you back to the Italian Renaissance
Well you should have thought of that before you were reckless with your butt
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
are you really asking me this. do you KNOW how many times i masturbate in a day? yeah. wrong person to ask about romance.
Randomize
