just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
cliffnotes. writing studyguide on last pack of smokes. glad this semester is over.
thank you TLC waking up to a water birth on tv really put the cherry on top of my hangover...
The sex I just had was not worth missing a girls night out.
Succesfully slept on the roof at work for 3.5 hours without getting caught. I need a promotion
The gay viking and his eqyptian 'queen' hooked up on our couches. They pushed them together to make a bed. Innovative, but awkward to come home from work to at 7 am.
I haven't gotten it in awhile but since spring break is next week I'm willing to have a pregnancy scare if it means no bleeding through the suit
Yeah wouldn't want it to interfere with beach sex. Nothing should interfere with beach sex
he shit on the floor last night i'm not venturing down there
My hands are stained pink. I look like I fisted a muppet.
in honor of breaking bad starting soon, i am now banging a walter white lookalike. viva heisenberg!
You know your acid trip is going well when the orange you're eating gives you a life lesson
That kid singlehandedly fucked the breakup right out of me. I'm only hooking up with Millenials from here on out.
Ps I took your recycling out, the 9 champagne bottles, vodka bottle, and tequila bottle is how I knew it was yours
The good news is I woke up fully clothed, on top of my covers, with a half eaten granola bar. So, breakfast was waiting for me and I’m already dressed and ready to go today.
he called her and asked for me. he wants to do dinner and a movie
her booty call wants to take you to dinner?
Randomize
