i wish exes would disappear into a world where we never have to deal with them again, and they can just create drama for each other. Then if they wanted to talk to us, they would have to apply to get a "visa" to come back to our world.
Bisexual people are plain selfish.
Well the bottom line is that I had to completely coat my testicles in Neosporin.
I think if it were a part of everyone's daily routine, the world would be happier. International Finger Yourself While Bathing Day.
What goes on in that head of yours?
Gay sex, for the most part. Why?
Just had a shirt made that says "I'm sorry" going to wear it every sat and sun morning for the foreseeable future
The air was thick with penises
Concert was great. Tackled the lead singer. Met him afterwards. He was cool about it.
Hey, please tell me that you and dad are having actual steaks tonight and I did not just get sexted by my dad
I'm to the point where I'm fantasizing about Iron Chefs going down on me.
I was laying out of the open window, talking with him on the phone, while we were both puking at the same time.. Guys at the party called it "true love"..
Of course, you have to give the courtesy text like last night when I told you my dick was gonna smell like peppermint
Don't worry my mom is buying me a vasectomy for Christmas
You gotta come over now. He is eating cupcakes while they are still in the foil.
We just finished having sex and as soon as we get out of bed he yells "trust fall" and runs me over
Randomize
