batman tramp stamp. Dibs.
it went kinda like vodka, childhood memories, screaming/cursing, fist fight, tears, broken shit, passing out. in that order. tis the season.
Let's just say for some reason we thought it was okay to make a burrito smoothie.
i would hope so, cause i don't think 'i drove off the road because i was getting some head' is covered in insurance
Your ass just called me, someone was yelling "awful waffle" and also, " I don't know who's hands are who's anymore"
My balls had bee stings let's just leave it at that.
So I feel bad, Ross is asking questions, I think they need to know it's a Spanish lesbian bar
No one suspects that a sweet girl who is excited about her anniversary with her bf just blew her partner at work in a communal area a few hours ago, so its cool.
My life has become one weird ass game. No one wins. No one loses. We all just kind of hang in limbo and hope we don't die. Eskimo sisters for life. Please have sex with one of them.
Just made out with the guy who gave me my tour. Full circle college win.
I hope the lord has blessed you with many tampons, child.
Grateful to be alive soliciting dick pics. Thankful i'm alive for these little things and especially these big ones too.
if i drink i'll go into liver failure but ok
totally worth it, dude its $1 pbr
reminiscing on last night: why the fuck did I feel the need to stand on chairs everytime we took a jello shot?
so you might not believe this but he made a powerpoint. and gave you a 3.5/10.
Randomize
