Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
Martha Stewart would most definitely roll a great joint.
Dude..masurbate with cocoa butter lotion..its like cocoa pebbles just gave me a hand job
I feel like I'm sitting in a sleigh of puddy. It's not a bathtub though because you need a sleigh to go down a mountain.
He's stoned as shit, eating breakfast cereal and taking a dump. All while listening to dubstep. We may never understand him.
I've spent more money on drugs for bonnaroo than my actual ticket. Proudly.
On the plus side I got to ride in a fire truck and I didn't have to blow anybody for it
And the clouds opened up and the sex gods said I hate you alfalfa
I need to find more Xanax, my Grandpa doesent leave for another week and he's made it a mission to get me to come out of the closet as a xmas gift to my parents.
Only I could host a baby shower where the cops get called.
Note to self: trying to grow pubes back = worst decision of 2014 thus far
There is a drunken, assless white chick here at this bar wearing a shirt that says "REAL WOMEN TWERK FOR JESUS". I have officially had it with our generation.
And now to play every stoner's favorite game: Where the Fuck Did We Park the Car?! Disneyland Edition!
Has anyone ever blacked out at an art show your dad brought you to?
Guess who won a basket of sex toys in front of his parents, aunts, uncles, sister, and cousin...
Randomize
