IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
I just made what I can safely estimate to be a 900 calorie pb&j. Fuck a serving size.
walking in back of a girl wearing booty shorts, a halter and a bracelet that says trainwreck. I don't get it. The first day of nice weather and all the whores come out, are they like hibernating bears or something?
Look, if he's not the brother with three nipples, I'm just not interested.
I think I wrote "thanks for the free alcohol!!!" in their wedding guest book and I'm almost positive I signed my name
This guys mom bought us a 24 pack and drove me and 8 others to a frat house... Hello moms weekend.
Does peppermint hummus sound good or am I just high?
He just asked me if he's allowed to flirt with me. That's how whipped he is.
Has my life seriously led me to day drinking on a Monday the third week of the semester?
It's after 5, it's not day drinking.
I brought him flowers on my way home from cheating on him. Boyfriend of the year award right here.
Well sure, my hetero side is thrilled, but my gay side is soooo judging
And then I went through the chix filet drive through for breakfast in all my republican post sex glory
i may or may not have bought a plane ticket for a russian cam girl to fly here. also, can you spot me $300 on rent?
I hate the cold months. Everybody starts hibernating and I start talking to guys I would never normally talk to. You have a drug habit and no license? Perfect candidate for a boyfriend...
I had to join a gym to keep up with this 22 yr old
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