that's just what I need...drunk ass people throwin hatchets in the dark.
She rode me to the beat of Baby Got Back. I swear to god.
I think I broke a hole in her wall trying to do backflips
If graduating leads me to stop getting naked at inappropriate times in public places I'm going to be pissed
I'm convinced that college is the only place where one can have an existential crisis over what sweatpants to wear
Tranny group. Dance off. Horse hair and dicks swinging. I. Cant. Unsee. This.
How do I tell her I need the lights out when I'm getting head because she and my mom share a perm color
There was a pumpkin carving contest and we carved a very realistic dick about to penetrate a vagina. Our Christian Youth hosts were not happy.
I don't know, I kept pretending that I was riding an elephant during. It was actually really fun, but you can't tell him that!
Wearing rip off pants to a booty call last night was one of my most brilliant ideas ever.
So the dog chewed my vibrator last night. It added a nice new texture actually.
I felt like the hulk waking up from a black out except with munchies
Sorry for drunkely attacking your best friend with a bow and arrow then loudly crying myself to sleep....PMS?
I want to die, ON THAT, with that INSIDE ME. ironically, I sense that would be the only time I'd feel alive.
New drinking game, drink every time Rhianna says "Work" in her new song.
Randomize
