glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
we're all still whores. we just have a theme song now.
Just heard this lady walk by on her phone saying "did everyone orgasm?"
America approved of our night. A bald eagle flew over us at 7am
How can I look at her with a straight face when she has dry puke on her eye lid
Wait til she sees the pic of her vag in court docs.
He ate me out on the balcony. My asian neighbors cats are judging me...ALL 3 OF THEM!!
i was really disappointed no one would drink beer from our cleavage last night except for us
the fat lady is now rubbing her stomach and staring at me. I hate trains
words I never want to hear dad say again: "Trevor you sexy man you"
we just talked about our morning and what we were doing for the day and he handed me the addies and i took $50 out of my bra in front of a bunch of frat guys. so the mornings going really well
I just slapped myself in the face with my dildo and I know that's a weird thing to share but I just had to tell to someone omg I'm laughing so hard
I'm naked in a forest ranger station right now
I got so drunk last night I took a ice bath with my mother in law
I hate closet cases. I've been wooing this chick the entire quarantine. We finally meet up tonight, we're two drinks in, I've got my hand half way up her skirt and her husband calls. She promised to bring home dinner.
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