Do u think she knows her nickname is the oompa loompa
We're watching an ocean show on Discovery Channel and drinking every time they say "dolphins." PS. Seals kill birds. Tell all your friends.
i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
Do you think Tom Brady went home tonight and changed his facebook status to "pink with lace"?
life is no where near the amusement park it was when I was on Vicodin.
Hands down the most disgusting picture message ever received. Thank you.
im here for your entertainment
I know your texting costs money, but I'll pay for it if you consider this. Oversized frozen jello shots. I'll buy everything needed if you approve. Let me know
Dude, she brought over peach cobbler, weed and alcohol plus I'm gonna get laid. She's by far the coolest sister you have.
dude, no lie, I would make out with you in front of them wearing nothing but a rainbow colored speedo
So I had sex in a bulldozer lastnight now that's definitely a first...
This girl looks like an elf and is obviously on coke. I want to be her.
I have the WORST cramps EVER. I think this is gods way of saying 'you're welcome, last warning. stop being a slut.'
I feel like I would find myself in so much trouble if I hadn't married my DD.
Bring me your tired, your weary, your buffalo chicken dip
I'm sitting naked on my bathroom floor and it remind me of us.
That's my way of saying I miss you
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