The weather is perfect in Seattle right now. Warm enough for girls to not wear bras, but cold enough for me to see them nipping out in the shade.
so my aunt is sitting on the couch, eating a brownie and watching the biggest loser saying how it's not that hard to eat healthy
man i love america
Just got head while drinking hot cocoa and eating cookies. Never in my life have I felt more like santa claus
I told you it's awful. It looks like he was eating honey at a barbershop and tripped.
Im in a bar and I just invented a scrabble drinking game. People are cheering. It's like the universe has aligned itself.
I don't remember anything but yelling at the ref in Spanish.
Bank of America: Available balance is $546.25 on 03/04/2011 for account 8428. Go online for details. TextSTOPtoStop/TextHELPforHelp
i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
I hope you realize, I'm counting on you as my wingman next semester. It's your turn to advertise another man's penis. I did my tour all freshman year.
after that, he'll be sure to remember me. i'll probably forget him, but that's the way it should be.
OMG HIS EYES ARE POOLS OF SEX. HOT SEX.
Volunteering at a homeless shelter a bum asked if he could lick me cause I still reeked of whiskey. Being a bumsickle=epic hangover
The cop asked you after the breathalyzer what you think you blew and you very discreetly shouted "I'm pretty sure i blew Kyle on the way here "
well it can jab him in the chin so I am 100% sure he can suck his own dick
He told me we shouldn't hang out because it would be weird and then snap chatted me a picture of his dick
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
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