I'm so high I used the top vent on my dashboard to heat up a cheeseburger
today is like waiting for pizza day in elementary school, but with sex added
Operation Purity has been aborted
you fucked my boyfriend. margarita girls night will not fix this.
im really going to miss that car, so many blow jobs...
Bud light lime after 12 shots of vladdy is like frolickin in a meadow of sweet flavor
He always takes me to get taco bell after we hook up in his car. It's sort of become a booty call tradition.
he gifted me a vibrator as he was breaking up with me. you tell me how my night went
Hey ask him if he likes swappy seconds
i would have fingered myself to death by now but the dog wont stop staring at me
I've been smoking weed using candles all week and I just found a lighter. This may truly be the happiest moment of my life. It's embarrassing how excited I got
So many Oreos I'm regretting this decision already but I'm happy at the same time...The straddle is real
Struggle. Not straddle. I'm not straddling anyone.
Also, for real, though? Did we even have sex or were we just jumping on the bed drunk and naked...because with me that's actually a possibility.
We're both fucking guys named Frank. Our friendship was meant to be.
U were so upset when the shower ruined ur nachos. I didn't kno what to do.
Randomize
