he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
At what point did I decide it would be a good idea to fill my contact case with vodka
When we were fucking i started barking and growling at her.. you shoulda seen her face
you know whats weird about having a girlfriend....I look forward to masturbating now....sort of like quality me time.
I want you to come here and listen to her climax and then tell me how funny you think it is.
I prob couldn't even get his attention if I had a dick growing out of my forehead
I got groped on the dancefloor by both grooms. I love gay weddings
you know you're a senior when your friends are at the bar before you even get out of class
why the fuck would you go to class? it's karaoke wednesday.
Everything was yummy and fruit flavored and five alive and happymeas.
You work today? I woke up with a raging boner that was whispering your name
So will your sis find it a compliment if I tell her I lost out on some awesome dick to go to her bday dinner???
I just masturbated at work... Don't know why but I thought you should know
only you would understand that I was talking from the perspective of my boobs
you said, "I wonder what your mum is doing right now." in the middle of sex, of course I threw up on you.
I'll get the most aesthetic strap on, you'll see
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