I've never had a man I enjoyed more than steak
I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
he saw my emergency pass-out-in-the-bathroom-after-drunken-puking cot in the bathroom.
They are literally fucking next to the DJ Booth to a techno Remix to Pacman. She is going waka waka waka. WHY ARE YOU NOT HERE FOR THIS?!
First I must say that I am disappointed to learn that you knowingly have trashy friends with whom you've not hooked me up.
judging by her collection of mens sweaters, shes fucked the entire lands end catalog.
Shrimp lo Mein doused in green apple Smirnoff is a rare delicacy only a few get to experience..guess I should consider myself lucky
I whispered "you're doing a great Job" when he was fucking me. Then high fived him.
Based on the time of Sean's "I'm on your street" phone call last night, we had sex for an hour and a half. Man, time flies when you're getting boned to an orgasmic death.
Id like to submit an apology whenever you feel like talking.
Its not gonna be for awhile Im not a very forgiving person especially since you TOTALED MY FUCKING CAR.
He left a fire sauce packet from taco bell that said "promise you'll text me in the morning" on my nightstand.
We were making eye contact while i was throwing up.
I walked in on my sister eating my leftover burrito naked. How could my night have gotten any worse?
He was out clubbing with his SON. WHY did you let me KISS HIM? Also WHERE WAS HIS SON?!
sometimes u just gotta ride a dildo and forget about life
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