I think there's some kind of asian convention downtown. There are thousands and they're all wearing badges and snapping pictures. I feel like I just stepped into your worst nightmare.
Is it wrong that im more embaressed about the karoke than the toplessness?
Im watching him eat cream cheese and hot dog buns.
if i can get a chik with a dibaetes pump naked a sling certainly isnt going to get in my way
Did I really just find a cheez- it box full of condoms in your room?
Your couch is like an animal shelter for stray drunks.
The worst that could happen is you end up with a black eye and I get laid.. I'm okay with my end of that bargain.
It is becoming increasingly more likely that my entire halloween costume will be entirely composed of borrowed clothing from the two girls I'm hooking up
only i would grind with someone to harp music at a gay wedding
Also, I saved your name as Everclear last night. No idea why I did that.
have you ever seen all dogs go to heaven this is important
Her tramp stamp said call me maybe. You should have run for the nearest decontamination shower immediately.
My kid made a secret wish that you have a baby... Make good choices today!
I've only fucked to 2 Fleetwood Mac songs, that must be why my life feels so empty.
He punched me in the face while giving him road head, because he was driving stick. I shit you not.
Randomize