UPDATE: In a passionate fit of self love, I brought myself to orgasm under the moon on my 7th floor balcony, ejaculating between the rungs towards the ground.
Unfortunately, I did not realize that most of it would end up on the balcony below mine.
At least you don't cum in color.
out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
Let's just be mature adults about last night and never speak of it again.
i just lost my virginity for the 9th time. when will guys stop believing that nonsense line
she walked in on me snorting my prozac. there was no way to convince her i was doing a good thing.
She's clinging to me like a horny koala.
I'm a lady, I can't pee on the ceiling. Even I don't have that power.
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
You were so high you insisted on spoon feeding me your KFC bowl while I was driving.
Was who let the dogs out playing?
Ya. You started barking when it ended
I would say I'm the man in the relationship but I'm cuddled on the couch eating cake mix and water.
If I puke off the kayak tomorrow think nothing of it.
Dude the tree smoked with me. I planted the roach with it and smiled.
You are a special snowflake. A special snowflake I wouldn't mind rough sex with
HE JUST ALLUDED TO FUCKING MY FRESH LOAF OF BREAD
you bounced a quarter off my butt and it came back hitting you in the eye. karma, bitch.
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