Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
I still havent given him the valentines day card i got him. I feel like just writting...."sorry for the horrible blow job i gave u last night." and just giving it to him.
So this shipmate of mine somehow managed to throw up in his back pocket.
i can't tell if you're serious or not, but 420 is gonna be pirate themed
I almost punched the night nurse in her face. I woke up and she was standing over me.
So hungover. They actually hid easter eggs around me.
And then as he was trying to conceal his boner from everybody, you said aloud "just grab your cock and get out of the pool"
Shit stained towel. The very symbol of how much closer we are as friends. Fall 011... beautiful disaster
I want him to rummage through my vagina. with unwashed hands.
you said, 'he held out his hand, that means we don't have to pay' about the taxi driver, and then asked the doorman what happened to your pants...
I climbed out of the shower to him sitting on the floor trimming his pubes with nail clippers, we both just started laughing at how drunk we were
I nicknamed her "Jackhammer" for the way she gave me a handjob. My balls were in constant pain
he's the only real guy friend I've had who I've never made out with
I've broken 3 vibrators in the past month because I apparently am "too rough" with them. Is that even possible?!
It was just another case of she fell in love I fell asleep.
Randomize
