Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
she told me her fantasy was her as a 55 year old cook at a truck stop who smokes a pack a day, and I was the 21 year old illegal immigarnt prep cook.
Since my computer broke, i've been masterbating to girls gone wild. I feel like i'm in the 90's.
weed salsa. i deserve a nobel prize
Went to the doctor's today. The lady took one look at my throat and said "oh god"
Too much penis in there.
It wasn't like a party or anything. They played PlayStation and talked about sports. Then I threw up on his porch.
i came so hard i kicked through my windshield
woke up with empty beer can still duct taped into my fists and the word "dove" written on the back of my neck
Someone the age of your son tried to go home with me from the bar last night
So that prostitue I banged at Steve's bachelor party just texted and invited me to a BBQ at her parents. Never again doubt the power of the cock piercing.
Well start with a list of things you don't want to do... Like maybe 1) I don't want join Isis. That's a good start.
Costco cheesecake and whisky. A night made in heaven
I'm not gonna swipe right, he has better hair than me. Just no.
It was rocky mountain showdown of course we got shitfaced and talked about eating buffaloes
Do you remember telling those ppl that they need to mate and give you the baby and in 15 years you will all reunite and it will be a party?
Randomize