Dude i dont know how people can complain that waterboarding is such a bad thing. I just sat through a fucking puddle of mudd show. Now thats torture
all i need in life is blowjobs and white cheddar cheezits
Just had to have the guy at Sprint clear the dried cum out of the trackball on my Blackberry. Wonder if that happens to him often.
I woke up naked this morning there was a baseball bat on the floor the bathroom door knob was removed and the floor was wet. This is why i don't do Tequila shots.
Some asshole just brought BK into my summer class, im already high as hell, i did not need another way to not pay attention
She said she couldn't sleep with a guy who had blood stains on his ceiling. I tried to explain it wasn't my blood, but she still left :(
Turned on my GPS and all that it said in the search bar was "beer,"
Imagine Captain Hook, but in penis form and sometimes shy.
She's riding a bike down the street and drinking brown liquor. A pt cruiser is honking at her and she's like I HEAR YOU!!
if memory serves, the guy you were hooking up with said he was a slutty skittle.
It's just great that Easter is on 4/20 this year. Now everyone can enjoy the Easter egg hunts. And being around my whole family.
I keep finding Kraft singles in his pockets. Honestly, this is the weirdest family I've ever worked for.
YOU BETTER TOUCH MY NIPPLES TODAY
We had sex and I never took my mets hat off... I feel like Duda knows and approves.
You're a wizard. You are a master of disguise. You are beautiful. I love you.
Randomize