I need to buy a mesh tank top to fit in in Florida. Where do they even sell that shit?
direct quote: "i'm so over my clit" either best or most awkward conversation possible with your COUSIN
alright so where did all these fingerpaintings on my bedroom wall come from?
dude. you drew those with your dick
On the one hand, she would be the biggest mistake of my year. On the other hand, she's here and drunk.
He took naked pictures of me and told me if I ever got to the Disney Channel level of fame he would help me out. I think i'm in love
one of the cashiers from Kroger is eating at my kitchen table and nobody knows why.
I fell asleep to the sounds of them banging in the next room. It was oddly soothing...
TOMORROW NIGHT CAN I HOLD YOU LIKE A BABY
Although, I did get to see a Raiders fan and his toothless girlfriend get roughed up by the police and dragged out of the stadium. So the night wasn't a total loss.
Is there a law against that?
Nope not at all. Just morals. But fuck it, this is college, not real life.
he ate me out like he was chugging a beer.
Now that weed is legalized There needs to be reusable bags for people to pick up with. All this plastic is so bad for the environment and a waste
I plan on getting so intoxicated, that I think it's MY own birthday
Can I play this game?
Me and my dad hot boxed a hotel bathroom... That's what I call father son bonding
I deserve a medal for being woke up at 6am on my day off by your mother asking where your brother is
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