But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
I'm sorry I'm just not ready to become vampire yet
If I remember correctly, I may have been smoking a cigarette on the dance floor. This is the true sign of a douchebag in his native habitat...fmylife
he is naked. in. my. bed. happiest day. of my. LIFE.
At least I can take solace in the fact that with 8 billion some odd people in the world, at least one of them is shitting in their own car right now.
we got a new version of the plan b at the pharmacy now. its called next choice. you would think they would come up with better names for these things.
Well It's time to grow up anyways, right? Now that you're graduated and have a job you can't drink uncontrollably
No. Now that I'm graduated I can drink uncontrollably at nicer bars
The most interesting things happen to you when your pants come down. I truly envy you.
He's currently rapping every word to 'more money more problems' at what could be a over 30s gay bar. I'm not sure yet. More info to come.
Well no need to be a stranger, even if you aren't interested in joining my bisexual polygamist marriage. New city, new friends.
It was a two-sided wall so part of my body ended up in someone elses condo.
don't worry about it. We passed around the "get jeff bail" can 10 min. After you left. We currently have around $400. May I say that people here at the dorms really love you.
I would say that that is the last time I ever drink a bottle of jack in two hours, but really who am I kidding?
I told him I want him to read me my Miranda rights while he's fucking me. Act exactly like he does while he's on duty except with his dick out.
Her hand jobs are magic. They smell like vanilla and awesomeness. She made me forget how to walk
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