You and i never got to the, we dont care what we look like friend-stage. you know? like not brushing your teeth stage.
sorry im really high
john hughes is dead. crushing any and all dreams of me ever being in an 80's john hughes film. bummer.
I had to go to the bank to confirm purchases made on 10/31/09 because they were signed as Lady Gaga
She is a fish and this place is a barrel. I can play this game.
I spent an hour trying to convert bar outfits to church outfits. Its hard.
Please find an outlet that isn't stripping or getting drunk and arrested
So the chick throws up over the rail from the 15th floor at the sky bar and I knew I would take her back to my hotel.
Honestly... isn't she a psych major? how does she go through life NOT realizing that everything she does is a cry for help?
Yea. It was an issue. Great time though. Apparently I went through the coat check, put my coat on and forgot I had it so I tried to go through again and just didn't understand why thy weren't helping me. Dave coat checked his pants.
So, seriously. How does it feel to know that you're riding a cock that was in kindergarten when you were going to prom?
Yeah..I guess you know your hair looks like shit when TSA asks to inspect it
She's like the Jonah Hill of sorority sisters.
And I made some girl take out the trash, load and unload the dishwasher, swifter, and clean the counters. So don't act like I don't do anything.
Are you sexting with minion stickers right now?
My neck feel like I've been sucking Goliath's dick.
Randomize
