Tickle wars 95% of the time end in sex.
I don't care how bad it tastes, i just put it in my mouth and deal with it
If you win this game of words with friends, ill suck you off for 30 minutes. No lie.
I cant last that long. Do i get the rollover minutes?
I am so 35 right now. Listening to REM, drinking red wine, and crying over an article about ecstasy in oprah magazine.
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
If you hook up with a kid and the next day he breaks up with his girlfriend, those can be seen as two completely unrelated incidents right?!
You'd think the dry cleaners next door would be less judgmental for as much business as my theme parties bring them.
My apartment smells like a lavender field inside of a giant bong.
After last night I think its official. Deep down, we like alcohol more than we like women.
When we missed a fist bump and simultaneously did the Rocket Power handshake I knew I was going to blow him.
So the revenge porn my ex posted just resulted in a contract with a gay porn company. I'm going to make $8,000 this weekend. That would a breakup checkmate. Are you joining me in the legislative committee hearing tomorrow?
Your final is gonna be as easy for you as getting into straight girls' pants is for me.
He drunk texted me what I think is two snails fucking on a mushroom. Is "you sick bastard" too mild a rejection?
I can't give advice right now, I have a yeast infection.
Kyle passed out in the tub after breaking a glass and shouting, "WHAT ASSHOLE GAVE ME A GLASS?" His girlfriend gave it to him...
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