he clicked a button a stirrups came down from the ceiling... if I don't come home by sunday, report me.
I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
I'm ready for this little girl to leave so I can hit the bong already
at which point I apparently ran in and shouted "I made the sex with that one!"
im laying here in the parking lot drinking a warm coke, prob still drunk, feeling like i need to apologize to everyone i know
she's a gynecology student. i don't know if my dick's ready for that kind of pressure.
This exeeds the amount of high I planned on being.
I knew it was time to leave Waffle House when you started singing "What's Your Fantasy" to your hash browns.
I went up to get a drink from the hotel room. And ended up getting arrested in the lobby. Spring break has not been forgiving this year.
At the ER. Dropped bottle lead to cut foot which led to me drunk hitting on doctors. Not going well.
my brain is opting to stay half drunk rather than relearn how to think. the rest of me is in no position to argue.
If you've never been pounded by an Eastern European body builder, I would highly recommend it.
our next stoner-chievment: cream of shroom soup. Get over here, this is happening!
Don't blame me. My vagina leads me astray.
Well. At least he's a gentleman. A gentleman satanist.
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