May i just say it is extremely difficult to pee in a cape
its 9am and we're in an escalade. I have no shoes and my dress is on backwards. I feel like we're the morning after a rap video
HOnestly. That's my one goal for this whole trip. I don't give a shit about souvenirs or sand. I want penis.
while being fingered today, I was told I have an abnormally deep g-spot. Now you know, I am a size queen because of SCIENCE.
I'm going to be blunt here. I don't actually care what you're doing tonight. I just need to know if I need to shave or not.
She's cheated on every boyfriend she's ever had with the same guy. She's like a slutty yo-yo.
Some rando is vomiting profusely into the garden outside the employee entrance. Where are you when things like this happen to me?
Vomiting outside the employee entrance
Oh wow. Was walking and just saw her in the pool, fully clothed, ranting on an alligator float. I guess i should go get her before security gets here.
i jsut waqnnna hugg thw crap outa sokme peoplee
I feel like I can hear facebook. What did we smoke?
Last time we had a party like that I woke up naked on the pool table with a chalk outline around me and a empty bottle of jager duct taped to my hand.
Yea. I'm excited about this party too
I wish I could remember her name, I mean we fucked and all, but it woulda been nice to tag her in the instagram pics.
I thought he put a fake swan in my yard, but no, he put a real life swan in my yard
the fact you finally accept your bi don't shock me but as your fuck buddy I expect you girls to go family style on me
i just found a lighter in my bra... from last night, and its 7:43pm...
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