You should have seen k-money last night. She was just hanging on to the toilet for half the night. By her fourth trip to puke, she started talking to it and was doing the voices for her and it. She kept saying "...we thank you for your continued business..." haha
I mean she's dancing like an epileptic patato and i'd like to slap her
i'd date him for the sole reason that he thanks me after giving him head
Wait, you seriously DON'T keep vodka in your backpack??!??!?
I fucked her wearing an American flag. Now here I am, awake, naked, and flag less. How do I report this to the police?
Whiskey??
It will be at least another 6 weeks before I say yes again. I'm bruised. I stole sex cards and a really nice pocket knife. I acquired a vial of my own blood. Talk about a yard sale...
I might have hooked up with a 2003 alumni last night in the basement
Dude you were ten when he graduated
Wahoowaaaaaaa
You are like the only girl I know who tells their booty call to go find another girl just cause you want more sleep.
Apparently there's nothing on sonza for "giving a handjob while sunbathing"
God if that man would just have sex with me every time I got mad life would be so much easier...
I felt like the hulk waking up from a black out except with munchies
I choose my mates solely based on size and ability. No cuddles. No sleep overs. Definitely no repeats.
I just found an old slice of LIME in my wallet?????????
I will warn you that there is a pic of me riding a buffalo....and for the record, I was completely sober!!
i only got to wear my halloween costume for an half hour before it got taken off.
Randomize
