I have to decide between the hot young blond with no apparent gag reflex, and the brunette with a great ass and a trust fund.
no more stoned jack in the box. this is the third night in a row.
You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
my sex list reads like a who's who of mcdonald's general managers
Just watched porn on a 60 inch plasma screen TV... So that's where the clitoris is
No, the weekend was great. It was the waking up in the pond in the raft without an oar that sucked. That fucking water is cold at 7am.
From the guy that lifted you into a fan I'm sorry
Found her with a stray dog now called champagne, crying about how she feels a mom now. Had to take her home. The dog too.
And I just realized we will be at a strip club when the end of the world is supposed to happen. This is destiny
My night was too much. My morning is even more. Help. I need to teleport the fuck out of here.
What happened to fro yo and sex?
I have a 8 minute video of a fish tank on my phone.
We need to stop going to pet stores high.
Well, if it makes you feel any better I'll be drinking tequila and doing lines on Halloween. Just like old days.
I feel a little uneasy about having my grandma sleep in my bed that I've banged chicks in not too long ago... Fuckin blizzards
Was it cause you feel bad for the ridiculousness my vagina goes through because same
Randomize