i don't remember her name, but i don't need it unless we decide to hook up again. but even then, i can get away with not knowing it for a while. it's not like we have actual conversations.
Five things that make you perfect. Go.
The skin of a dead hooker. The blood of the innocent. The soul of a kitten. The hat from cat in the hat. And sunglasses.
Baconater + red wine = first meal of the day
It's a shame that I don't know his last name. Actually, it's an ever bigger shame that I don't know his first name
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
We just had to use a designated driver to get to night class.
So was it you or me who decided it was a good idea to inscribe fuck you on the counter?
That was me. Just a 'welcome to our home' kinda thing.
okay, please tell me Cammy is the one who put the picture and note on my desk saying "beat off to this homeboy"
My life has become one weird ass game. No one wins. No one loses. We all just kind of hang in limbo and hope we don't die. Eskimo sisters for life. Please have sex with one of them.
We played table tennis, but used tv remotes taped to our foreheads instead of paddles. Every time your opponent scored you took a shot. I'm the current champion as of last night.
Didn't think the day of being the oldest in a club would be when I'm twenty one. Even the bouncer looked surprised when he ID me.
This is me trying to take a picture to send to grandma. At 4. We were trying to look sober.
I mean, drunk me really liked him, maybe sober me will too. Who am I to deny fate?
Eventually I will start sleeping with people who actually want to hangout with me the next day... But not today
i haven't seen you in two years and we have like 16 hours, all i want is cuddles, wine, and some light groping
Randomize
