Gte hit a new low, I took a poopnap, passed out mid poop on the toilet.
rhymes with "ouble enetration"
Her tattoo has the intellectual profundity of snakes on a plane except you can't laugh.
I'm destined to be knocked up by a sailor
Just wondering did you put mouse traps and brownies on my porch?
you know u lost to a carboard cut out of sammy sosa in beer pong last night.
Don't blame me for eating all the ham.. I gave it out to people, so at most I'm guilty of ham distribution
Make sure your heart doesn't explode. These are words of wisdom.
Hm, finding a time when my drinking and your real life don't conflict could be difficult
You are right. The scrape marks on her ass are from her breaking the doggy door by crawling through it.
because i know somewhere at some party, behind someones closed bed room door youre being feed a key full of mollie.
I'm sure we could make a ball of yarn and a nickel into a drinking game
K, im gonna wait to get my dick pierced so we can do it as a family function.
Aw don't be embarrassed. It was all good fun! We've all been there. You can't come to vegas and NOT get a little alcohol poisoning. That's like going to church and not praying.
Yea it's also hard to turn down a man asking you out with a chicken sandwich.
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